Parenting during lockdown: 5 Things I've learnt.

Day 500 (or so it feels) in lockdown and I'm feeling all kinds of reflective about my time spent in isolation. Primarily focussing on being a mother during these tough times. Parenting during lockdown has been a journey & the pandemic has really changed the way I parent my daughter. There's been ups and downs, but I'm in a place where the positives outweigh the negatives.

^{[Photo by Benjamin Manley on Unsplash]}

My thoughts on lockdown.

Lockdown itself and the reasons behind being in isolation are unnerving. For me it’s the fear of the unknown. I still feel like there’s so much about coronavirus that we just don’t know about yet & I find it all really alarming. My husband and I are both on furlough with neither of us 100% sure we’ll have jobs to go back to once this is all over and done with. We're preparing for the worst. I think it’s naive to believe that once lockdown ends we’re all going to go back to normal. I’m convinced Covid isn’t going to work like that.

That being said, I do feel positive (on a whole) about the situation we’re in. We’ve got so much more family time now. It’s time we’d never make the most of & time we’ll probably never get again. I’m 100% in the mindset of making the most of the situation we’re in. We’re enjoying seeing our daughter grow, especially as she’s changing so much at the moment; I’m just so grateful we get to witness it all first hand, instead of from a WhatsApp message from our childminder.

I presume the vast majority of us are feeling reflective right now, whether that be with your employment, dreams or aspirations or in my case what I’ve learnt about myself as a parent. We may not all the in the same boat, but we’re sure as hell in the same storm. I’d like to think my reflections as a parent can help others, no matter what their situations are right now.

5 Things I've learnt parenting during lockdown.

1. Kids are resilient, but so are we.

Resilience is the ability to bounce back from stress, challenges or trauma. It’s something which children are renowned for having, but I bet if you look a little closer to home, you’re pretty darn resilient too. Look at how we’re pulling together & how we’re supporting one another in our communities. We’re amazing & we need to celebrate it.

I’m big on quotes over on my Pinterest and the saying ‘you’ve got through 100% of the bad days you’ve had’ has definitely gotten me through. Parenting during lockdown means you have to be resilient & pull yourself through the sometimes really awful days. I’ve been applying that mindset to my lockdown life & it’s 100% worked for me.

2. It's okay to miss pre-lockdown parenting.

Gosh the days are long aren’t they! Pre-lockdown I was so used to having my parenting day split up by going to work. These days I haven’t got a choice but to be a parent 100% of the time. And I mean this in the best way possible. But I really enjoyed my time ‘being me’ at work. The me who wasn’t a mum and the me who could put herself first for a few hours out of the day.

I miss the old me. At the beginning of lockdown I beat myself up over feeling the way I did, but now I’ve come to realise that it’s totally okay. My feelings in no way reflect the way I feel about my daughter.

3. You don't have to do it all.

The biggest issue for me when lockdown was first introduced & furlough life began was that as a parent I felt like I had to do it all. This added pressure came as absolutely no surprise. I’m 100% that mum that rushes around like a crazy person during nap time trying to get 101 different jobs done. Why would lockdown be any different?

I’ve definitely learnt to chill a bit more over the last couple of weeks. Instead of feeling like I need to be preparing the next activity to keep my toddler occupied during lockdown, I’m putting myself first. These days I take myself outside, leaving my phone indoors meaning I can fully enjoy a coffee in the back garden. I listen to the nothingness around me and it’s bliss. I 100% recommend you try it!

4. You'll have good days and bad days.

Understanding that you’ll have good days and bad days parenting during lockdown is so important. It’s imperative however that when you are having a bad day to know that it's just one day. Tomorrow could and probably will be totally different. The bad days you have shape you, and I 100% believe you learn from them & become better for having them.

I used this mindset when I was in labour; Yes, it was hard, yes it was painful, but it was just one day (almost two) out of all of the days I’ll ever have & I 100% put my positive birth story down to this mindset.

5. Laughter gets you through.

Oh Lord, laughter can get you through anything.

I don’t just mean the laughs from my daughter, although these are the absolute best laughs, I mean all forms of chuckles… I’ve howled over FaceTime with friends reminiscing on the days of underage drinking and telling our parents we were staying at each others house when really we were staying at our latest squeeze’s. I’ve been silly with my husband & acted life goofs embracing each others weirdness. It’s been brilliant, and it’s so nice to let loose and forget responsibilities and pressures of day to day life!

The future of parenting during lockdown.

Who knows how much longer we’ll be parenting during lockdown for? All I know is that I’m going to spend the rest of my time with a positive mindset & enjoy the extra time we have as a family together. I’m blooming in my own way & doing my own thing in my own little bubble – I hope you guys are too!

How are you feeling about parenting during lockdown?