A parenting & lifestyle blog written by Claire Chircop.

AUGUST THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS - TAKING A BREAK & PROJECTING POSITIVITY.

After surprisingly negative thoughts and feelings during July, I've had a complete U-Turn this month and I'm getting back to my usual place of feeling more like myself; I've taken a break & now I'm projecting positivity.


Taking a break and projecting positivity.


Taking a break.


A huge factor in my change of mindset this month has happened from taking a break.

At the beginning of the month I had two weeks off work, one of which was spent holidaying in Scotland and the other we had at home where I felt like I was able to get a little bit of my sh*t back together. It was blooming glorious.

While we were in Scotland I made a conscious effort to minimise the amount of screen time I was having. I was present and in the moment, and therefore able to soak up as much family time and Mother Nature as possible. It's amazing what getting battered by blistering Scottish winds does for the soul! I love being at one with nature and living the slowest of lives. We even stopped by Holy Island on the way home, which is one of my most favourite places. Everything about the Island appeals to me, the slowness, the independent businesses, the fact it's quite literally cut off from the rest of the world. It's my happy place & I loved spending a bit of time there this month.

The following week I was able to do all the jobs I'd been wanting to do & that had been hanging over my head for such a long time. I was off work, but May was still with the childminder, and let me tell you, it was a much needed time of solace and calm for me. Or as calm as you can be when you're blitzing the house from top to bottom, applying for jobs and creating content for online platforms.


Taking a break and projecting positivity.

Feeling myself.


It's no secret that during lockdown and spending three months on furlough I unknowingly took myself on a journey of self discovery. I got myself to a place where I was seeing me as me and not just a mother, and although that dipped last month, I'm definitely getting myself back on track to where I used to be.

I think a big part of rediscovering the confident, empowered & fearless me has come from enjoying fashion and beauty again; And I realise this may come across as highly materialistic, but I feel a damn sight better when I've got a bit of makeup on and I'm wearing a killer outfit.

I've gotten really into tie-dye this month and have pretty much been wearing the same two oversized Femmeluxe tie-dye tee's on repeat. I don't think I've worn tie-dye since I was a child, possibly even ever, but this pink oversized tee and lilac oversized tee have been featured in so many different outfits this month. They're amazingly versatile and even oversized enough to wear as mini dresses, although I'm not quite that brave!


Parenting.


I definitely feel like things are falling back into place when it comes to parenting. Although it's a new one, we've started settling into a routine and I'm feeling much more confident again in my abilities as a mum. Gone are the days of struggling to leave the house on time, the last minute rush and the impending stress that came before starting an even more stressful day at work. I'm so much more chilled on a morning now, and have definitely gained a 'zero f*ks given' type attitude when it comes to the state we leave the house in.

My toddler is also in the will she nap / won't she nap stage for a little while now, and the days where she does need a nap are becoming fewer and fewer; In fact if she does nap, it's a miracle and I never quite know what to do with myself. She's 2 in December, so is currently 20 months old, which I always thought was early to be dropping naps, but here we are, we're napless and we're powering through... The both of us.


Taking a break and projecting positivity.


Being too nice.


Naturally I'm a very positive person. I'm far too nice and far too helpful & to be honest it's something I've never really given a thought too, however over the last week or so it seems to have gotten me a bit of stick. I understand why being 'too nice' can be seen as a negative or a naivety, but it's a part of me which will probably never go away, and if that's a bad thing, well I'm okay with it.

This goes hand in hand with my new found attitude of being fearless in motherhood & fearless being me; I'm fully aware of my flaws and I'm here loud and proud embracing them... I'm too nice! There I said it!


How have you been this month?


Claire.X


August thoughts and feelings. Taking a break and projecting positivity.


WHY TURNING 30 ISN'T THAT BAD AFTER ALL.

Turning 30 (the big 3-0) is often something that's dreaded by so many. Transitioning a whole decade older overnight is definitely a milestone, but it's one I'd actually been really looking forward to. Going from your twenties to your thirties is such an emotionally huge upheaval, but today I'm here to reassure you that turning 30 isn't that bad after all.

Turning thirty isn't that bad after all. Shelfie with 30th birthday plaque.

I asked my instagram audience earlier on in the week of their thoughts and feelings regarding turning thirty & not surprisingly a lot of people said they weren't too keen on the idea (not like we can stop time or anything). The vast majority of people in this demographic were also those that are rather interestingly currently in their twenties. The fear is real people! So why is that?

As women especially, I feel like we're conditioned to feel fear when approaching thirty. Whenever the turning of a new decade is mentioned, it's met with questions like 'oh gosh, that's a big birthday' or 'oh wow, are you scared?' And don't even get me started on our body clocks! Damn those people who feel they have a right to question our body clocks.... That's a rant (which I feel very passionately about) for another day.

How I felt about turning 30.

For me, I always felt like my late twenties were a bit mediocre; not the years themselves, but the numbers... I know that sounds 'woo' but stick with me. There's something about the number 30 for me which just feels so much stronger. It's bold. It's bright. It knows exactly who it is.

It's a number I wanted to be.... And *spoiler alert* so far it hasn't disappointed!

The lead up to my thirtieth birthday was somewhat unusual in the sense that the UK was still in the midst of the coronavirus pandemic, we were then still in lockdown, and things were all just a little bit weird. (Weird is the only word I can use to describe the situation, because that's what it was/still is -WEIRD). Dan & I were on furlough from work, we were both full time parents trying to occupy our toddler during lockdown and if I'm honest my birthday was the furthest thing away from my mind at that moment... Much to my husbands disapproval.

That being said, it was a day I'd looked forward to. It didn't fill me with fear & I was excited and felt ready to say 'Hello, my name is Claire & I'm a 30 year old woman!'

Why turning 30 isn't that bad after all. Claire smiling at the camera.


A time for reflection.

I couldn't help but feel reflective on the lead up to my thirtieth birthday. I thought about the previous decade & how much I'd changed over the previous ten years. Had I achieved everything I wanted to achieve? Was I 100% happy with my life choices? Am I even sure of who I am right now?

We never really give ourselves credit for what we achieve (I definitely don't anyway) but when I was thinking about what I'd accomplished over the previous ten years, things really didn't seem all that bad after all. I'd bought a house at 24, managed to keep alive our lemon beagle puppy, who obviously isn't so much of a puppy anymore (boo!), I met and married the man of my dreams... And our biggest achievement of all, we welcomed our daughter Amelia-May into the world.

Aside from physical achievements, the biggest change I've seen in myself, is just that... Myself! I've changed a ridiculous amount from the shy twenty year old girl trying to grow out a 'Frankie hair cut', to the woman I am today at thirty. It's actually insane.

It's only in the latter half of the decade that I've noticed myself knowing myself (say that after a few tequilas) & I'd 100% say the biggest impact to my confidence has been becoming a mother. That's not me saying I'm the best mum, or I know everything there is to know about being a parent, that's me embracing that sometimes I'm not going to know what to do, sometimes things don't always fall into place, and I'm okay with that & I can conquer that - I'm fearless in my abilities as a mother & I'm fearless being me. I'm at a place now in my parenting journey where I'm seeing me as me & not just a mother, and let me tell you it feels f**king incredible!

Turning thirty isn't that bad after all. Claire holding 30th birthday plaque.

How I feel being 30.

Although my twenties were full of amazing experiences, I definitely feel like it was a decade of figuring sh*t out... And by sh*t, I mainly mean myself. There were times when I didn't stand up for what I believed in and there were many occasions where I let myself subside, still replaying the moment over in my head thinking 'if only I did this differently'. Well that Claire is no more!

Right now, as a thirty year old woman I can hand on heart say I've never felt better! And it seems so many of you feel the same way, because when polled the majority of my 30+ Instagram audience said they felt better now than they ever did in their twenties... And I'm so here for that! My audience also said however that they felt there was a pressure to have your sh*t together by the time you reach thirty, which I do somewhat agree with, although my thought turns to the question 'what actually is it that defines having your sh*t together?' Because in reality I believe the answer will be different for each individual person.

For me, I feel like I have my sh*t together because I live a happy, relatively stress free lifestyle. Sure there are things I'd like to change and improve upon especially with regards to my career, but in the grand scheme of things I think I'm doing alright.

Looking forward.

I've learnt over the years that although it's good to plan ahead, life will no doubt throw you a good curveball or two & it's these curveballs that you've got to account for. Did I think as a twenty year old woman that I'd move away from my family & get a mortgage in a city I'd never even visited before? Nope! Did I think as a twenty-four year old woman coming off the pill it'd take over three years to conceive a baby? Nope. Did I (or anyone) think that this year we'd spend three months living in lockdown. Absolutely not!... Hands up who even knew what the word 'furlough' meant before 2020, because I sure as hell didn't!

Sure we'd like to move closer to our families, and sure we'd like to have more children, but will these things be on the cards for us? Who knows? Learning to loosen the societal pressure is something I've come to terms with & not being dictated by the pressures of 'textbook life' is a life I'm 100% embracing. 

Why turning 30 isn't that bad after all. Claire smiling at the camera holding a bunch of flowers and a champagne flute cheersing to turning 30.

This is thirty.

Thirty is sassy.
Thirty is confident. - @amy.the.mama
Thirty is empowering.
Thirty is when it starts getting good. - @rosalynoxercoaching
Thirty is comfortable.
Thirty is liberating. - @mielandmint
Thirty is enlightening.
Thirty is not caring.
Thirty is thriving. - @jodetopia
Thirty is knowledgeable.
Thirty is much less stressed.
Thirty is knowing who you truly are. - @swigdigs
Thirty is giving the middle finger to judgement.
Thirty is f**king fabulous darling!

Now ID me to make me feel young again!

How old are you? Are you nearing to 30? Or have you reached the glorious age? Do let me know in the comments below if you're embracing the big 3-0?

Claire.X

Why turning 30 isn't that bad after all. Pinterest graphic.